Member-only story
The Power of “Don’t”
I was scrolling through my social media this morning and was stopped cold in my tracks. Have you ever had that happen? You’re mindlessly scrolling, and then you see something that absolutely blows your mind? It makes you have to stop and take it in.
The post that stopped me this morning was a simple quote by investor Naval Ravikant; “The first rule of handling conflict is don’t hang around people who are constantly engaging in conflict.”
As a confidence and public speaking coach, a foundational part of my work with clients revolves around self-talk. Self-talk can make you or break you and is probably the most powerful tool every single person has in their toolbox. The problem is that most people have no idea how to use this tool to their advantage; they just think that they think what they think, and have no control over it.
Sometimes being wrong is a beautiful thing. ;)
When working with a client, one of the first things I encourage them to do is to become super self-aware of what they are saying to themselves throughout the day (i.e. what is their self-talk chattering about). What they find initially is that there are a handful of ‘roadblock’ words that come up often; can’t, maybe, try and don’t are pretty typical. Words like ‘maybe’ and ‘try’ are key because they are non-committal, while a word like ‘can’t’ is often an excuse…
